South Africa: Day 8, Pretoria

We started today off by talking with T’s favorite caregiver and social worker and discussing a list of questions we had generated. It's been invaluable to be able to ask them anything that pops up. From the care home, we headed to the National Zoo (which is also in Pretoria). Getting there was almost more of an adventure than the zoo itself. Brian had to navigate through this crazy part of town with TONS of people milling about and cars and vans doing whatever they wanted. It should have taken us 10 minutes to get through that area, but it took almost 30. There were these commuter busses that will shoot across the road without warning. Needless to say, our lives were in peril getting to the zoo.

Naturally, Roy was along for the ride.

Because school started today, we had no issues finding parking and getting into the zoo. On a recommendation, we hired a golf cart to ride around the part. For only $7.50, we were able to zip around the entire zoo and check out all of the animals in record time. Brian and I couldn’t get over how close the animals were. We could have pet a rhino or elephant, if we had wanted too (and apparently it's somewhat acceptable according to some locals). I really did want to, but I also have to now set a good example. Stupid adulthood/parenthood. There was a tiger who was pacing back and forth the whole time. It terrified me. I thought for sure that thing was about to leap over the pit and eat us all. 

T and an elephant.

It was fun to see different animals that don't find a place in American zoos. There were these really brightly colored red birds, a cool horse/antelope thing, and more. The lions decided not to show themselves, even after visiting their habitats three times! Along with that, my Scandinavian skin rebelled and I burned. I now have raccoon eyes and an awesome burn on my arms showing off where my 3/4 length sleeves were. 

We finished at the zoo and went to a mall to walk around. Brian was able to find a shop called Old Khaki (basically American Eagle) and bought some sturdier flip flops. While there T got an ice cream treat (really my snack choice, but became his about half way through). We headed back to the care home having walked a good bit.

Saying goodbye to T was a little easier today because we knew tomorrow would be our first sleepover.

T and the rhinos with downtown Pretoria in the background.

South Africa: Day 7, Pretoria

When we got up today, we were facing a logistical problem—we were running out of clean clothes. We needed to do laundry, but didn’t want to be away from T all morning. We decided that we would see if the place we picked out would wash, dry, and fold our laundry for a reasonable price. Before we went, we decided on an amount we were willing to spend (no more than $35). Armed with that information, we headed to the laundromat. When we arrived, we asked how much it would be to take care of the giant bag of clothes. The answer? 212 Rand, which comes out to about $12.63. That was an easy decision!

On our way to the home, we got a call and text from the social worker that works full time in the home. She said T had asked for us three times (by 9:20) and she wanted to know when we were coming. Thankfully, we were 3 minutes away. Praise God he was asking for us and wanting us to come visit him. He hasn’t turned us away, yet, but it’s good to know he at least wants us to show up.

Today was a really good day with T. It was us shifting from being with T the whole day alone at the home to seeing him interact a lot with his friends for most of the day. When we got there, there were several women waiting to interview for open positions at the home, so the room we typically spend all of our time in was being used as a waiting room. We were told to go out to the classroom and visit with T there and outside today. We were excited because his file mentioned how much he loves to play outside, but he has not played outside once with us there (perhaps as a way to really focus on spending time with us specifically.

We pushed the door open to the classroom (just one room that’s about the size of an average living room) and discovered a fun chaos. Kids were dressed up, playing pretend, coloring, and assembling puzzles. One of the caregivers put out some tables and they began preparing for school, which starts tomorrow. She asked T to write his name across his coloring page, he refused, she asked again, and he lost it and began to cry. I went over and rubbed his back and asked if he wanted to come sit by us (he was across the table from where we were sitting). He said yes and he moved. I don’t know exactly what caused that response, but we will be talking with his favorite caregiver tomorrow and asking about that, along with a giant list we have.

When T got done coloring and drawing on this picture, we saved it. He's such a creative kid.

After coloring was snack time. It is never so quiet at the home as when they are feeding the kids. They get their food and silence descends. Their main goal is to finish and get extra if there are any. These kids are well fed (thank you, God), so it’s not a survival of the fittest situation. They are just intent eaters.

This wasn't the snack today, but a fruit (??) called litchi T shared with us a couple of days ago. Neither of us had had it before, so T enjoyed being the one to show us how to eat it. Note: R49.99=about $2.50

With snacks and juice consumed, we headed back to the classroom for even more chaos and fun. We observed today that T enjoys playing with his friends, but he also enjoys playing by himself amidst these friends. He played one-man cricket for a little bit before Brian stepped in to pitch. For the life of me I cannot understand why he was instructed to stay inside while partaking of this activity, but it was apparently preferred. I was waiting the whole time for someone to get beat upside the head with T’s cricket bat. Thankfully, it never happened.

Lunch was a good time with fish and chips being served. It was the first time we had eaten with all of the other kids. It was silent until the local comedian (a boisterous kid with a super fun nickname and only one volume—"11") thanked the cook for cooking his lunch today. He’s clearly the best eater in the home and Auntie Florence (the amazing cook who knows the value of a good eater) lost it with laughter. All of the kids lost it, too. To hear all of them laughing together was so sweet.

After lunch, our normal room for playing in had been vacated. T and I played with Legos and safari animals while Brian sat at the table getting a little work done. It was nice for us to be back together with just the three of us. After a while, we packed up and headed to the mall. 

We let T guide us around the mall as he desired. We ended up in many stores and admired many watches and neck ties (watches are a reoccurring theme to our mall walks, but the neck ties were a new one). At one store, he really liked a dapper straw summer hat. I had wanted to buy him one before, but I didn’t know if he would wear it. We promptly found a kids store and let him try on the four kinds of hats they had. Watching him try on hats was heart-meltingly adorable. He would put the hat on, turn his head, and consider each hat before he made his decision. I cannot wait to post a picture when the time comes. He is such a handsome little dude!

Brian, T, his purchase (hat), and Roy. Also a commemorative coin given to him by a shopkeeper.

After strolling around and getting lost (because every mall here is huge and just keeps going in weird directions), we headed to dinner (also at the mall). We let T choose where to eat and he chose a fairly posh restaurant with an interesting menu. Thankfully they had cheeseburgers (the only thing this kid eats when given a choice, apparently), so we settled into our cool chairs. T loves watching people walk by. He gets very quiet because he’s taking it all in. After eating, he opened up and started joking around with us and talking about our plans for tomorrow (visiting the zoo if the weather holds up). 

How Roy spent his dinner with us.

We are thankful for today and hopeful that tomorrow is even better. It will be our first big outing together as we will arrive at the care home early and take him out shortly after that to the zoo.

South Africa: Day 6, Pretoria

Today was hard. Today was us hitting the wall. Today was filled with ups and downs. There were a lot of factors that were different than the last five days we had visited (today was the day that most of South Africa goes back to work after Summer holiday, today was back to school, being Monday, the additional staff that works M-F were in the office, and there were a ton of visiting college students at the care home this morning, making everything loud and busy). T barely talked the whole morning. It is hard to press on when you feel like you're being ignored. 

When we went to lunch, he really opened up! He was laughing and smiling while we were playing in a children's play place. At one point, he even cracked a joke. I have joked with him at other meals asking him, “Where did your burger/chips (fries)/fill in the blank go?” because he seriously inhales his food. Today, he looks at me with a serious face and asks, “Where did my burger go?” It took me a second. When I looked for his burger (duh) and then back at his face, he had a huge grin. That kid. He’s going to fit in just fine.

My "mega" Coke Light (Diet Coke) and T's cream soda . 

The second we said we had to go back to the home, he clammed up and gave us the cold shoulder. He also tested us a lot. Anything we said "no" or "not today" to was received with asking many times more or the silent treatment. He usually answers with a nod or shake of his head if he doesn't want to use words, but he wouldn't even do that in the car on the way back from the mall. 

When we were back at the home, I asked him if he was mad at us for something. He shook his head "no." I told him it was ok if he was, and that we could talk about it if he wanted to. He nodded in understanding, then went back to playing. It lightened up after that and we ended on a good note (we got a hug when we left), but today was hard. It's hard playing with him when we're being ignored, but we kept pushing through and asking him questions, even if he would only respond with nods.

Our difficult day was topped off with a missed turn on our way back to the hotel after dinner. We discovered on the ensuing journey that our headlights point down and we can only see about 10 feet ahead of the car, that "dead robots" are even more dangerous when you’re going down roads with faster speed limits, and that Apple Maps and TomTom were both out to get us. Both apps sent us to the exact same wrong location. It’s terrifying driving around downtown Pretoria and being lost. Thankfully, we saw a landmark that was familiar and were able to get back to the hotel. We arrived shaken, but safe, something we do not take for granted. One of T’s caregivers was in a smash-and-grab Friday night (while stopped at a light, two men smashed in her window and started grabbing her phone and whatever else they could—scratching her arms badly in the process). You have to be on high alert while driving here, especially at night.

Some good things from today: T sat in my lap while I read him the same book twice in a row (his request). He called me "mommy" today (not just "Mommy Heidi" as he's been calling me). There were good moments mixed in with the hard and I’m glad for that. I didn't expect less than good and bad days. We are strangers getting ready to be a family.

Daddy and T and Roy, playing a game of soccer together.

On the whole, I think things are going well. I know he is going to fit perfectly into our family. I am excited for when he is more comfortable with us and for when we don't have to leave him at the home at the end of the day.

Look at those muscles. This kid could beat you up.

Some ways you can pray for our family: 

• Please keep T in your prayers. He has a lot going on in his head. You can tell he’s always thinking, always absorbing what’s happening around him. There is a lot going on and he’s seven. Pray for his heart and mind to be guarded from things that are said and done that might not necessarily be helpful to this attachment process.
• Pray for Brian as he is still working while here. It’s a lot to juggle—family, church, work, and more. We are thankful he’s able to still work while here, as that’s something some families spending 6-7 weeks in South Africa are unable to do.
• Pray for me. Being gone from home this long is hard and we still have 5-6 weeks to go! I miss my bed and our shower that drains properly. I miss driving around and not feeling I have to be on high alert while waiting at a stop light. I do not miss the winter, so praise there. Well, technically I'm missing winter, but I digress.

South Africa: Day 5, Pretoria

Today saw an early start. We got up at 6:00 a.m. (10:00 p.m. Saturday for most of our readers) to get ready and go to the 8:00 a.m. service at Bryanston Bible Church, an Acts 29 church in Sandton (around 35 minutes from our current hotel location). It was good to be a part of their church, but I definitely miss Redeemer Fellowship. This was our second Sunday away from our church family. After church, we headed out for a quick breakfast. During our trip to the mall (EVERYTHING is in a mall here), we found gluten-free cupcakes. We had wanted to get T’s favorite caregiver a gluten-free treat for the birthday party earlier in the week, but that is like searching for a needle in a haystack here. So when we found one, we were very excited, as was she!

After breakfast, we headed to visit T. Our GPS took us a crazy new route (it’s seeming rare for us to take the same route more than once). This one took us through the hills (that are basically mountains) and past a huge Sunday market (tons of people milling about and walking alongside the road). It was a beautiful, terrifying, and long way to T’s home.

We surprised T by getting there before lunch. We thought that we’d show up after lunch due to church (which we told him and prompted his request for us to be there in the morning), but thankfully the church had an early service (hence getting up at 6:00 a.m.). We pulled out our Legos and started playing. T is a really imaginative and creative child. He comes up with these stories that he will tell us as he’s playing and working out the different scenarios. After Legos, we watched a couple of shows with the other older children, played Snakes & Ladders, and read a book. 

I brought a blank hardcover book and some new stickers for him, so he began creating an underwater scene with the fish and dinosaur stickers he had. It was hilarious. Not only were the dinos eating the fish, they were eating each other, and some random girl who was under the water. In true boy fashion, poop was drawn, along with smell lines. *sigh* This kid. 

Photo of T's art, Roy, and Brian courtesy of T.

At the mall this morning, we bought some Play-doh, so that was a good time, too. He insisted on squishing every Play-doh form that was made, so I started punching and chopping mine with my hands. I got a good sized smile out of him along with several giggles. These moments feel so light. 

Attachment is hard work. It’s not just coloring and playing, it’s hoping your new child wants to hold your hand or will make eye contact. It’s building Legos and looking for a reason to rub their back and being enthusiastic to praise their creations. Staying in the same room (as we’ve been doing at the care home [aside from watching shows]) makes for long days of sitting on the floor because you want to be as close to him as possible. 

Today was the first day T allowed a couple of his brothers (other boys in the home) to play with us and with his new toys. It was only 15 minutes, but it was good. Brian and I want to let T know we like his friends without showing preference to them. 

At the end of our day, we had planned (since yesterday) to take him to KFC (his second favorite food). Five minutes before leaving, he changed his mind and wanted pizza. So we plugged in the info for a pizza place he likes. It ended up being an adventure. We got to the place and didn’t feel it was in a safe location (a feeling you need to respect here), so we found the next nearest Roman’s (pizza place). It was 25 minutes away. About 10 minutes into the drive, I remembered we needed to be back at the home by 6:30. That was only 45 minutes from that time. Cue the panic! We drove and were doing the math thinking we may be eating pizza in the car on the way back to the care home. 

At a stop light (robot), we saw a McDonald’s (McD’s). I asked T if he liked McD’s (because I don’t know). He said he did. As soon as we passed the intersection containing the McD’s, T decided he wanted to eat there and not Roman’s. After a U-turn and 5 minute drive back, we ended up at McD’s. After a rushed meal and drive back, we left T at the home with his aunties (caregivers). 

McDonald's date with T.

I am hoping we get to start doing sleepovers soon. I think it would benefit both T and ourselves to spend the entire day with him and not have to leave him at the end of it.

South Africa: Day 4, Pretoria

We really enjoyed today. It started with us checking out a guest house (US equivalent to a bed and breakfast) for us to stay at for week 2. We got out of the car and an adorable bulldog greeted us and wanted to be pet. I was sold before looking at the suite. It worked out well for what we need—two beds, a pool, and a yard for T to run around in. We hope that starting Thursday or Friday of this coming week, T will start doing overnight visits with us.

After checking out the room, we got to the care home and played with Legos and dinosaurs (together, of course). At one point, one of the Lego people started riding around on a broom. I off-handedly said he was like Harry Potter. T’s face lit up and he stopped moving the Lego around. I asked him if he knew what I was talking about and he said yes. We told him his room was decorated like Harry Potter and he was very interested. (We’ve shown him his room before, but not explained it yet.) So that was a pretty great moment. 

Lego construction men riding helpful dinosaurs—naturally.

T & Daddy Brian (as he's called at the moment) & Roy

We got to go out to the mall with T for lunch. When we made the plans yesterday, T wanted pizza. He was very adamant on this point, as it is his favorite. We got to the restaurant and all of a sudden, it’s a cheeseburger and pizza. We compromised and he ordered just a cheeseburger and he could have some of our pizza if he was still hungry. Along with the cheeseburger, he also ordered a cream soda. That cheeseburger disappeared very quickly. Brian and I are sure he inhaled it—I think he’s going to be growing soon. He enjoyed watching the chefs take the pizzas out of the pizza oven. We played with Roy (I got my first full toothed grin from that). After a good meal together, we walked to a candy shop and T picked this test tube looking thing that sprays sour strawberry liquid. I tried it, squirting two times into my mouth and almost lost my lunch. T was squirting it up to ten times under his tongue and not even making a face. This kid.

Photos courtesy of T. He enjoyed taking photos at lunch.

When we were done at a delicious coffee shop with many unique single-origin African coffees (Brian’s words, not mine), we walked to the book shop. We’re really trying to build a love for reading books. We let T pick out a book, but had a difficult time finding one in English (Afrikaans is very prevalent in this area). He picked out this weird book about a girl giraffe with no neck who wears sparkly high heel books. Weird. It ended up being an ok book, thankfully. Along with that, we picked up a new illustrated Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone for him. We are going to start reading him chapter books while we’re here.

After the book store, we headed back. Our boy was tired, so there was very little talking on the way back. Occasionally we would hear him squirt that gross sour stuff and it got comical when he would squirt 7 times or 10 times. Once again, this kid. 

Back at the house, we played Legos again, read his new book and a couple of others, including my favorite from when I was his age—The Day Jimmy’s Boa Ate The Wash (pictured). We colored in his dinosaur coloring book and put a transportation puzzle together. When we finished and cleaned up, we told him we would come tomorrow after lunch (we're hoping to attend services at an Acts 29 church just south of here) and stay through dinner. He told us he wanted us to come in the morning. (I think he likes us!) Because of that request, we are now going to go to the 8:00 a.m. service at church and surprise him by coming in the morning.

Story time together. I love this picture.

I told Brian at dinner that this is the first day where leaving the care home was hard for me. The first and second day left me emotionally and physically tired and I needed a break. Today was hard to leave him at the home. Sitting at dinner felt a little empty because he wasn’t there inhaling food and giving shy smiles. I miss him. We can’t wait to go back tomorrow.

South Africa: Day 3, Pretoria

This morning began with a flurry of excitement. We woke up and headed to a mall (not the one from last night). The mall is huge! Think Mall of America huge, but just a little smaller, and no wasted space with "attractions." We got there just 5 minutes before they opened and scoped out Toys ‘R Us to see what their Lego offerings were (we had a gift to buy after all). Seeing what they had, we headed to Toy Kingdom which boasts the largest selection of Legos in South Africa. Along the way, we found balloons, party bags (or " loot bags"), candles, plates, and napkins with lions on them (just like Roy). At Toy Kingdom, we grabbed two Lego Jr. truck sets and some Hot Wheels cars and helicopters. We also found little bubbles for the loot bags and these crazy awesome water ballon things (100 finished and ready to go in a minute without having to tie anything—magic!). After completing our party list, we grabbed a quick breakfast and headed to visit with T.

Brian driving around in the wrong side of the car on the wrong side of the road.

When we arrived at the home, we were greeted by a huge hug from T (my heart melted). We brought all of the stuff for the party bags and had T help us stuff them. He did a great job and was very thoughtful in the process. He kept insisting that these bubbles were for his cousins (in America), these chips were for us, and so on. We told him we could buy bubbles for cousins when we got to America. T chose Avenger bubbles for both himself and Roy (it was his birthday today after all). After packing the bags, we played with his cars and Magformers. After a short stint with those toys, we busted out a dinosaur coloring and activity book and read some of the new books we had brought with us. T sat on Brian’s lap while I read the books.

While we were eating lunch, one of the orphanage volunteers and her daughters (who have been helping there for 6 years), told us about the Tooth Fairy at the home. Apparently this volunteer “extracts” the loose teeth, then the Tooth Fairy comes and leaves 5 Rand. The child is then allowed to go to a corner shop down the street with one of the Aunties and get a sweet. (We’ve seen so many instances of the workers trying to make life special for these kids, and working in special one-on-one interactions where possible.)

After lunch, T got to open his gift from us. It was a fun moment to watch. T and Brian took the cars/helicopters and Legos out and got to building. I headed outside to set up for the party. While playing, Brian observed that T was very intent on putting pieces together and loved working with the trucks and using the Lego broom to sweep up the little Legos. 

The party in its humble glory.

When we were ready for the party, we had T come out. We put a ‘7’ candle in his cupcake and attempted to light it (it was very windy). After Brian basically burned his hands off, we got it lit for a grand total of one second. After several more attempts, T got to blow out his candle and had a round of “Happy Birthday” sung. We passed out the green cupcakes with an orange blob in the middle and let the chaos and sugar high begin. There was cupcake everywhere. Ants were quickly on the scene for cleanup. Roy now has a little green on his snout where T shared some of his cupcake (adorable) and an orange smell from the juice he drank (sticky). 

A boy and his Roy.

After cupcakes and juice, we set the kids loose to have a water balloon fight. I thought it was going to be chaos, but it was fairly tame, all things considered. Most of the kids threw the balloons at the brick wall. Others pinched holes in theirs and squirted others. It was a good time. When all of the balloons were finished, T handed out the party bags and they all downed some more sugar. Surprisingly to Brian and I, the potato chips were a HUGE hit (we thought it a weird request from T). Most kids went straight to the chips and then the sugar. After the party was over, T, Brian, and I went back in to clean up. We said goodbye to our boy with a big hug and plans to go out on our first family outing tomorrow - getting one of T’s favorite foods, pizza for lunch (apparently KFC is a close second).

Today we saw a few instances of our son’s kindness. He has a tender heart that is really turned towards others. One example was when a girl’s balloon bounced off the wall and flew back into the crowd of kids, T was the first to it. Instead of throwing it himself, he handed it back to the distraught girl. We were told by one of the volunteers, who has known T for 6 years, that he used money he had saved up to buy a chocolate bar. He then proceeded to break it up into pieces and shared with many of the kids and workers. 

I honestly cannot believe we’ve only known this child two days. Obviously we still have much to learn about each other, but it feels so natural. Grace upon grace.

South Africa: Day 2, Pretoria

Today was a day we will always remember in our family—we met T for the first time! There are very few moments in your life that compare to meeting for the first time a child who will be a part of your family forever. After the initial awkwardness wore off (let’s face it—it’s awkward), we really enjoyed our time together. It felt surreal to be putting a puzzle together, coloring in the coloring books, and building Hot Wheels garages with him. He’s not just a file we’ve read or photos we’ve looked at, he’s a stinking cute, shy, thoughtful and contemplative kid with a sweet smile and a love for his new lion, "Roy."

Building garages for his cars.

While we were breaking the ice, we talked about his birthday party we’re going to celebrate tomorrow (we missed his actual birthday by a few days). He announced it was Roy’s birthday tomorrow and he needed a party for him, too. We decided we could celebrate Roy’s birthday with his birthday. He (and Roy?) wanted green cupcakes, balloons, potato chips, lollipops, party bags, juice boxes, and chocolate (later vetoed by his caregiver because it would melt in the 100°+ heat—wise woman). Along with party planning, he showed us his room and bed, introduced us to his brothers and sisters (other kids in the orphanage), and kept brushing down Roy’s unruly mane (which was the cutest thing ever).

Roy shortly after getting a mohawk, courtesy of T.

While spending time with T, and as he opened up more, we felt such a peace about this boy joining our family. His personality fits well with ours. He’s analytical and likes creating things, but still feels things deeply. That’s basically an amalgamation of Brian and I’s personality to a T (I can’t help myself when it comes to puns…even bad ones…please forgive me). We know everyone is on their best behavior right now, but from what we’ve been told of him and his personality, we know the Lord has gone before us, even in this.

After spending 4.5 hours with T, we left to get a quick nap in before we headed to the mall. We had a big list of things to buy for this celebration. Unfortunately for us, we had 1.5 hours to get everything by the time we got to the mall. Another unfortunate thing? The mall had lost power at some point during the day, and about 90% of the stores were closed. The other 10% must have paid extra for generators. We got the candy, cupcakes, juice boxes, and potato chips. The other things on our list—party bags, balloons, a gift for T, and candles for his (and Roy’s) cupcake—we are hoping to find tomorrow before meeting with him again. (We found another mall in the area to try tomorrow morning before meeting up with T.) The hour and a half goes by really quickly when you don’t have a Target where you can buy everything you need. We were going into shops (the ones that were open) hoping to find something off of our list. Time flew and the shops closed.

It was fun venturing out into Pretoria. The mall is different than American shopping centers in that there are grocery stores in the mall and within department stores. It’s also crazy how cheap things are. After we had exhausted everything that mall had to offer, we decided to grab dinner. We had a nice, sit-down meal while seated by the misting machines on the patio (it got up to 102 today!). The total for this delicious meal, including tip? $13! Score one for South Africa and one for our bank account.

I didn't get many photos while we were out and about due to helping Brian navigate, but this is one of THE biggest buildings I've ever seen. This photo does not do it justice. It's basically a skyscraper on its side.

By the time we were done with our frantic shopping and dinner, it had gotten pretty dark (a storm was rolling in, making it even darker). We had been warned not to stay out when it was dark for safety concerns. While we didn’t run into any issues with people on our ride back, we did run into an issue with technology. There are many traffic lights (called "robots" here) that are just out of service, making them four-way stops as in the US (though without the blinking red lights. It’s hard to know when its a four way stop because the robots are super hard to see, even when the lights are working. Those dead, small robots become a safety issue when you cannot see them coming in up the dark. Needless to say, our drive home was quite an adventure. We decided that we won’t make it a hard and fast rule, but we’re going to strive to be back to our hotel every night before dark to avoid the dangerous dead robots.

All in all, a pretty awesome day! We’re now back in our hotel room watching a SPORT (rugby). We’re growing in so many ways. We are excited to go visit T again. We’re excited to celebrate his 7th birthday.

South Africa: Day 1, Pretoria

Today we landed in T’s birth country of South Africa at 7:00 a.m. after a long (10.5 hours) and very bumpy flight from London. The flight was a little emotional because I hate long flights. Couple that with the turbulence we experienced and I was in tears at one point. Brian did not sleep at all and I slept maybe 30-60 minutes. But we made it safely! 

When we landed, I started crying because it hit me so hard we were here to meet T and become a family of three. Brian asked if I was ok and all I could reply was, “I’m so happy.” It’s been such a journey of processing the fact that after two years of paperwork and waiting, we are meeting the boy who will be stuck with us as parents forever.

We were greeted with a blinding sun (blinding after 8 mostly rainy days in London) and temperatures that reached 99 degrees. Good-bye, winter! After making it through the non-airconditioned waiting area for the border patrol, through customs, collected all three duffle bags, got our mobile phone SIM cards, and checked out our rental car, we were ready to head to our hotel, 30 minutes north in Pretoria.

Navigating this journey safely was difficult as we were so exhausted. Thankfully, drivers weren't nearly as crazy as they are in London. After making it in one piece and checking in to the hotel, we headed up to our suite (thank you, Hotwire). It is hard to describe the room, but I can tell for this area, it is a nice place. Being greeted by a super hot room (AC had been turned off) and a tub that doesn’t drain properly was a little bit of a reminder that we’re not in London anymore. Thankfully, they have a delicious restaurant with an all-you-can-eat buffet of South African staples.

View from our hotel room

View from our hotel room

View from our hotel room

After assessing our living quarters for the next week, we got a call from one of our social workers here (Rose). She said that T’s primary caregiver and social worker wanted to meet with us before we meet him tomorrow morning. We were thrilled to have them come to our hotel to meet, so we accepted. Then we slept. Hard. Then we woke up still tired.

At 4:00, we met with the caregiver and social worker. We talked with them for three hours. Most of it was about T (more info about his likes, dislikes, personality, history, etc). We also talked about South Africa and fun things to do in the area. I feel like the three hours we spent with them, readied my heart to meet T once and for all. Brian and I have both been so nervous about meeting him—what if he doesn’t like us? We don’t know him but for the limited things we have read on paper. Talking with these women who work day in and day out with T and clearly love him brought us such a peace. 

We’re now back in our room and getting ready for bed. All in all, a good day. Tomorrow, Lord-willing, will be better. We will meet our son!