Tomorrow changes everything. Again.

Our home for the next three months.

We cannot believe that our lives will forever be changed tomorrow at 11:00 am (4:00 am CST). It’s the night before we meet our daughter. We are excited, nervous, scared, happy, pretty much everything under the sun.

Everything changes tomorrow and yet today was a relatively normal day, as far as spending time in Johannesburg / Centurion, South Africa is concerned. We got to meet up with Tisetso’s Grade R (Kindergarten) teacher, Emmylou (“Teacher Emmy”). She had a profound impact on Tisetso’s life in the short time that she was a part of it. She believed in his ability to push beyond goals that others said he would never achieve. We are forever thankful for her.

Getting to meet her, her husband, and daughter was such a treat! They met us at Bosvelder—a seemingly traditional Afrikaners lodge-style restaurant that they suggested, and It was amazing! Her husband ordered six starters (appetizers) for us and we tried new things and they were all so tasty. It was hard to pick my favorite, but I’d have to say it was tripe & totters, a seasoned stew with mashed potatoes on the side. Brian liked the tripe & totters and the lamb’s tail best. For dessert, Brian and I split peppermint crisp tart and malva pudding with custard. Needless to say, four hours later, we walked away full and were thankful for this time with these two friends from afar.

So here we sit, Tisetso in bed, getting ready to end the day ourselves. We have a bag packed by the door with stickers, paper, markers, and other fun activities to play with our children (!!). Just like Tisetso got Roy the Lion, our daughter is getting a special stuffie. “Shelly the Turtle” has made the voyage across the ocean with us and will be introduced to her new best friend tomorrow.

Please be in prayer for us. We are so excited, and hope she is too, but know there have to be a lot of nerves on both sides. We want tomorrow to go well for us, Tisetso, and our daughter.

Here we go!

A Hummingbird and a Call (One Year Later)

One year ago today, I was sitting in our backyard holding a hummingbird that had flown into our window. I was simultaneously hoping it would stay forever and be my animal friend and hoping it would fly away. I was hoping it would stay for obvious reasons. Hello! Who wouldn't love an adorable bird who drinks sugar water being your friend?! At the same time, I was hoping it would get better enough to fly away. I had an important call I was waiting for and really wanted to give all of my attention to this call.

Our social worker had emailed us the day before (Thursday) asking if she could call as she had a file of a child she wanted us to consider. I was hopeful, but cautious in my hope. After about 20 minutes of holding this fragile bird and feeding it, it flew off. As I was standing up, my phone rang.

She said he was a six year old boy. She said she thought he would be perfect for us.

I knew. I knew he was our son. 

I called Brian to tell him the two simple things we had—his age and gender. Then I went on a walk. I've had strong feelings before, but this was intense. My husband and my family can testify that strong feelings are sometimes the only way I feel things, but this was different. It was confidence and hope and tentative love. All for a six year old boy on the other side of the world. I prayed that God would help me discern my feelings.

We prayed together over the weekend and called Monday morning asking for the file. What followed was 43 days of waiting to see his face. Those 43 days were painful. They were heartbreaking. I didn't know what my son looked like, but I knew he was the child we had been waiting for.

Oh, how much can change in one year! Now we're in a new season of life, filled with fighting for attachment, building love, and growing in trust. One year can hold so much. This past year has seen our family of two turn into a family of three. 

I am thankful God brought Tisetso into our family. Adoption isn't rainbows and unicorns, so when you have sweet moments (like this anniversary), you hold on tight. I am excited and hopeful for what the next year will hold.